I mean come on 2017!!!
Speaking of fresh beginnings, I have been thinking long and hard about new year resolutions and how I struggled over the years and I had an epiphany(hmm!) .
Happy New Year! Image Source:Google |
But you see, I mean I can't even commit to 5 mins of exercise and diet without succumbing to a sudden craving! How weak is that?!
But you see that is me, a weakness I have lived with over years ,my inability to follow through on my ideas, live my dreams, make up my mind on so many things, severe unprofitable liaisons etc.
My inability to stick to my guns when I need to say NO to people but rather say yes so I PLEASE rather than OFFEND.
Today I choose to put myself out here, warts and all.
I choose to put out what people might think is the vulnerability of most and as such not unusual but there is a reason.
This might sound like another resolution but perhaps seeing it as a duty to self being thrown out in the open might make it more desirable to achieve.
I need to self-detox, rediscover self again and learn other life lessons as they come along.
I want to sleep and wake up with just my own burdens on my chest, I want to be able to say NO NO HELL FREAKING NO to a lot of things without feeling sorry and displeasing myself for the selfish benefit of others.
I want to take baby steps again and grow into something I have dreamt to always be for a while now.
I have heard, shared and lived the physical and emotional pain of so many and in the process unconsciously become an emotional wreck myself.
Bloody hell, why does my own Agony Aunt go MIA when I need her? As I unconsciously set up myself to be that for others.
Well, I choose to understand what self love is and live it for me.
I have sacrificed blindly , trusted in faith and without bias , wholeheartedly laid myself down like the proverbial "doormat " to be walked over because am all about selflessness and sacrifice and perhaps kind hearted like that !
P.S This device is now officially out of storage,look elsewhere.
There is perhaps a lot I could learn from my toddler ; zero worries,undeterred and cheering only for self.
Perhaps this might not go down well with some but who cares? it's always been about others now it's about me!
* so help me God*
I have always been happy to keep whatever concerned me at the back burner but I guess it's time a detour happened, it's about pruning the irrelevancies and sticking to what really matters .
Am grateful for the few genuine at heart God blessed me with, they are like the needle in the haystack ,hard to find but worth the effort.
In all, I refuse to let this musings of mine end up being confined to the bin of history .
I should indeed practise more self love because Life is too short to gloat over memories which reminds us of the past.
Its time to live the dreams which gives a glimpse of the future.
I choose to Live Love and Laugh -for self
I choose Self Love
Yes to Self Love
I plea allegiance to Self
2017 in a few.
See you in a bit x
No comments:
Post a Comment
Please let me know what you think. Your views are very much welcome.